FF#6: Join the Marathon Maniacs

On 25 May I completed the Edinburgh Marathon in 3 hours 54 minutes. This was my third marathon in three months (after Blackpool in April and The Meadows in March) which qualified me to join the Marathon Maniacs. Hurray!

My acceptance email from the Marathon Manaics - woo!

Why do I want to be a Marathon Maniac? I want to be a member of a club whose membership must be earned. It's been a while since I've been in a professional organisation, and that's the only equivalent I can think of. My running coach Angie Spencer is a member and talks about Marathon Maniacs on her MTA podcasts. My brain must be suceptible to suggestion when I'm running. Almost all of the members of MM are in the USA.

So by running three marathons in three months I earned the right to pay $45 dollars (£27) and call myself  Marathon Maniac #9397. This entitles me to spend more money on merchandise so I can tell the world I'm a Marathon Maniac; to access the forums on the MM website; to a newsletter; and to print out a generic membership certificate.

Awesome!!

And yes, pointless. Especially when three marathons in three months has left me in less than great health - my recovery has been slow (combined with college deadlines, end of term work and family busy-ness and lots going on at home).

But some of the FF things have to be pointless. That's why their on the list - they're so pointless I wouldn't do them unless I was celebrating something. Which is what the FF list is all about.

I'm hoping to run my Autumn marathon (Loch Ness at the end of September) in my MM vest. I wonder if anybody will notice.

FF#24: Host a fundraising hafla (or 3)

June was my busiest bellydance month of the year so far. It was also my college deadline month. It was foolish to choose June as my "get more sleep" month (FF#26).

On June 17th I hosted Another Little Bit of Cairo on Duke Street: the Leith Festival Hafla. It's the fourth time I've hosted this free event because I like to put something I enjoy into my own community as part of Leith Festival. It's also my way of trying to get more of my students to become part of the bellydance community, by letting them see what a hafla is, in a very informal setting. The venue is The Parlour, a pub on Duke Street in Leith, and the event is free, so the idea is that people who are a bit interested but also a bit nervous will find it easier to come along.

It's also great when people walk in to their local for a pint and find it filled with bellydancers making a racket. It's fun to watch the expressions of surprise, joy and/or terror on the faces of regulars when they walk in. You might detect some of it on the face on the man at the bar while I'm performing:

There was a smashing atmosphere and all of the performers were smashing. There was a raffle at the hafla and we raised £83 for Parkinson's UK.

Two nights later was the Marvellous Musselburgh Hafla. This one is also annual, and this might have been the 6th time I've hosted it. This year it was plagued with problems - the date I wanted wasn't available; the only date possible was two nights after the Leith Festival hafla; then the venue was getting renovated and the new one they offered wasn't suitable; several of the performers didn't show up. But in the end if it was a fun evening in a smashing new venue (Wire Mill Social Club, next to Musselburgh Racecourse) and we raised £236 for Parkinson's UK.

Thanks to all the bellydancers who performed at my events; to everyone who helped organise and made them run smoothly, at the Parlour and Wire Mill; and to the lovely audiences who came along and cheered.

If you're interested in bellydance in Ednburgh or Musselburgh you can find me at www.swishandhips.co.uk

FF #21: try poledance

Having a little bit of birthday now and again is just brilliant. Today it was great to have a little treat instead of coming home from college to study!

Today's FF was trying poledance. I've been wary of poledance for years because of its roots in the sex industry - I think bellydancers tend to be very cautious of 'sexy' performance activities because we're sensitive of what we do being mistaken as saucy or sexy (when in fact it comes from the Muslim world, not best known for women making the most of their sexy.) But several of my friends rave about their poledance classes, and with the obvious gymnastic and upper-body-strengthening benefits, I have really been looking forward to trying it!

I went to the Crags Sports Centre and Ann Goeswell's Goeswell Dance with my lovely friend Kim, who has also promised me that we will hoop a 5K this year, which is FF#22. It was a one-hour class, cut down to about 45 minutes because someone else needed the room -  but that was fine with me because there really is only so much time you can spend on the pole on your first class without your shoulders going into spasm.

Ann's approach to teaching was "there you go, get on with it" - she didn't break moves down much, or over-think them. In the warm-up, I just watched and repeated, over and over again, until I got a rough idea what I was supposed to do. I think I did pretty well! I could only do it when I was copying Ann in the mirror - left to my own devices I didn't have a clue!

Feet firmly on the floor, feeling the fear...

... and doing it anyway! whee!!

Look closely, I am actually *not on the floor*!!

The amazing thing was the FEAR. I had FEAR of hauling myself up on the pole. Taking my feet off the ground using only my arms. Something in my head said I would find myself flat on the floor in nanoseconds. I paused and realised that pausing was useless, best just get on with it. And I did. I didn't end up on the ground. I was in the air, ungainly and inelegant, for serveral seconds. Wow!!!! I overcame a bit of fear! Woot!!

When I learned how to launch myself into moves, I realised that it actually felt like I was flying. Feeling like flying took my attention away from the work my arms were doing and stopped me noticing how hot my hands were getting, how much my pecs ached and the place on my ribcage where I'm pretty sure a bruise is developing, right now as I type. 

Kim says I should practice sitting on the floor in a kneeling position with my toes under my bum and my knees as far apart as I can manage - this is pretty much a core position for poledance! My body currently doesn't even understand that position!

I anticipate bruising and not being able to wash my hair tomorrow.  I think I'll try to go back next week.

Thank you Kim for helping me fulfill FF#21!

FF #8: My engagement ring

FF #8: get my engagement ring re-made

I got engaged on 14 December 1997. DH (darling husband, but that also happens to be his initials) wanted to ask my mum first (quaint - although I think I made him do it). We went out for a birthday meal with my mum and his parents. I'd already chosen a diamond solitaire and he had it in his pocket. As the evening went on I resorted to gentle kicks under the table, and those facial expressions with judicious use of eyebrows that say "go ON! Ask her! Get on with it!". After dinner he suggested a wee walk up Calton Hill.

You can imagine that in mid-December it was a bit nippy out, and the parents were keen to make the return journey to their homes in Glasgow. About one-third of the way up, they called time on the adventure and said they were off. Dave was forced to ask my mum for my hand in marraige there and then (her answer as I remember it was "oh! well you'll have to ask Elspeth!"), and there was much back-slapping and sniffling. We got married in October 1998.

DH and I when we got engaged in 1997

and when we got married in 1998.

Some time round about 2008, the diamond and it's setting came off the band of my ring. I was lucky to find them in my jeans pocket, but having small children and a wedding ring on the same finger meant that the repair wasn't a priority. I always meant to get it mended but never found the time.

But today I got my special birthday present from DH: my beautiful engagement diamond re-set into a new ring. The setting includes gold from the original band. It's a totally different setting, so it won't catch on my clothes the way the old one did. It is utterly beautiful and I love it. I've been grinning all afternoon since I got it and I can't stop looking at it!

new ring, old diamond.

More than just a piece of jewellery, this diamond means so much to me and I'm so lucky to be able to wear in 24/7 again. Given the chance, I would marry DH all over again and I wouldn't change a thing. Life has happened to us over the last 16 years with good times and challenges, but Love Never Fails. I love DH and I love what we have together. If he asked me to do it all again, I would say yes, yes, yes, without any hesitation.  

(We got my ring re-made by Ariel at Annie Smith in Stockbridge. He was very patient and attentive and he's done a marvellous job!)

FF#11

#11: Learn to play chess with Scott

Scott is my son and he's 9 years old. I'm not sure how he learned to play chess, but his birthday present to me is to teach me, after giving me a chess set. I hope his understanding of the rules is in fact the same as that of the rest of the chess-playing world.

Chess is one of those things I thought I'd be able to do by the time I was forty - one of those things that 'proper grown-ups' can do.

Tonight, after four days of him eagerly asking me if I'll play chess with him (since he gave me the set), I sat down to have the rules explained to me. We played a game, with me asking lots of questions. For a moment I thought, wouldn't it be terrible if I beat him in my first game?  However I really needn't have worried. He beat me easily.

Me getting beaten by a boy in gorilla onesie.

Chess feels like it works a part of my brain that I usually try to avoid working. I expect it would ward off dementia and be a Very Good Thing To Do.

Scott loves chess and was really passionate about explaining it to me. He's enthusiastic about thinking through his moves. Wow - is this really my son? Off learning things I don't understand, and having the patience and maturity to explain them to me? 

I frequently worry about finding ways to connect with my son while I still have the chance, while he still cares (at least a bit) about what I think and wants to share his passions with me. I've watched him grow from a toddler who want to show me everything into an independent boy with a growing desire for autonomy and privacy. He's not going to want bedtime stories for ever (although we're currently sharing The Hunger Games and he's always begging me to read more, hurray) and then, what will we share? Learning chess from him and playing chess with him, for me it's a way of finding a connection.

So I won't say that I've ticked this one off the list - one game doesn't mean I've learned to play chess - but it's a good start. I'll let you know when I manage to beat him!

The Forty Fest: The List

Tomorrow will be my fortieth birthday.

I've learned from the last 39 years (or at least the ones I can remember) that December birthdays are difficult to celebrate. Too close to Christmas, the celebrant and their friends tend to be tired, busy, skint, preoccupied with shopping, family, exams and staying warm to really want to celebrate.

(It occurs to me right now that perhaps all my friends for the last 39 years just haven't wanted to celebrate with me... I hope that's just pre-fortieth insecurity. Not that my birthdays haven't been great, but they've taken a fair bit of work and organising.)

So, for my fortieth birthday, I decided to stretch out the celebrations with a mini-birthday every month, seeing a different friend or group of friends and having a celebration on the 14th of each month.

But 40 is a more fitting number than 12, and so my list of forty things was born. I've spent a few months thinking about what I'd like to do for my birthday, and who I'd like to celebrate with. My list is as follows, in no particular order.

1. spend a day smiling at everyone I see
2. learn to meditate
3. run a spring marathon
4. go dancing in a nightclub
5. spend a night under canvas
6. join the marathon maniac club
7. skinny dip with friends
8. get my engagement ring re-made
9. try a burlesque workshop
10. have a McGonnagal Supper
11. Learn to play chess with Scott (my son)
12. Knit a scarf
13. Run a sub-4-hour marathon
14. raise £4000 for Parkinsons UK
15. have a full medical
16. become a mistress of the chin-up
17. get my teeth whitened
18. go on a bus tour with my Mum
19. dance a duet with my best friend Hannah
20. go to a fitness professionals convention
21. try poledance
22. hoop a 5K
23. paint a fairy door
24. host a fundraising hafla (or three)
25. finally visit the Scottish Parliament
26. one month fitness challenge - get more sleep
27. write My Running Story
28. integrate yoga into my life
29. have a beautiful mirrored studio to work in
30. be able to do handstands, or walk on my hands
31. learn 10 things about myself
32. run 40 miles in my birthday week
33. duet at karaoke with my lovely husband
34. have tea in Edinburgh City Chambers
35. get on All Request Friday on Radio 2
36. meet 40 new people 
37. make a difference in Malawi
38. fitness challenge - 40 full push-ups continuous
39. not let my roots get out of control 
40. get a daily make-up regime

Some of these are volunteered by my friends and family, some represent where I thought I'd be when I got to be 40, and some are whimsical and frivolous. Some will be more challenging than others. There's nothing there I really don't want to do, because let's face it, it won't get done.

This blog will be my record of doing these forty things. Thanks for stopping by to hear about my journey - I hope you'll come back and see my progress!